The Third Trimester...giving up work and embracing the bump.

38 weeks, enjoying the calm before the storm!

Hello!  I'm still here, and still pregnant!  But sadly not pole dancing at all any more.  I think you will forgive me for this when I tell you I am 39 weeks this week, which means 1 week away from D. Day!  Apparently in Australia it is most common for babies to arrive between 38-41 weeks, so any day now (please baby!)

My last term of teaching at BPS and The Peach was term 5, from 29th August- 23rd October, or from 28 weeks- 35 weeks pregnant, and it was absolutely fantastic!  I cut down from the previous terms 14 classes per week to just 7, of which only one was actually a "pole" class, an open level, the rest being stretch, floor work and chair based classes.

I am so glad I kept on working even though at times I was exhausted and aching, or sometimes the commute to and from Sydney and the Central Coast got a bit much, especially at 10pm!  I'm just so glad I did it because it kept me moving, even in the more advanced classes where I pretty much just lead warm-up and then instructed.  Just doing those 7 warm-ups per week made a huge difference to my fitness and well-being, and got me squatting, stretching and strengthening my joints.  I was still able to demonstrate some floor work and chair tricks, but, as in every blog post I've written so far, I have to thank my beautiful students who were always happy to demonstrate and always let me off the hook of pushing myself too hard.  Not to mention my gorgeous colleagues who supported me so much and, in one particular case, came to my classes as a student, ready to take over the class as teacher should it be necessary...shout to the divine Lacey at BPS!!!

Last week 8!  35 weeks

I feel like this third trimester was more about tackling the mental challenges that pregnancy presents for a fit and active person, rather than the physical.  It is such a strange limbo period as your body changes, you are not yet fully physically incapacitated and still have quite a lot of energy, but at the same time you are not capable of your "normal" pre-pregnancy or even early pregnancy activities.  It was frustrating sometimes as someone who is used to being so active, and sometimes I felt guilty for not being able to do more.  What I kept telling myself was that there are very few times in your life when it is definitely ok to be easy on yourself and rest your body, so to take full advantage of it!

Pregnancy is such an interesting experience for everyone, but for body-concious, fit people it can be very challenging.  For the first time in my life I have little to no control over my body, it's limitations and the changes occurring.  Any athlete is used to being able to push their physical limitations using mental strength and determination, and through pregnancy you have to let go of this control.

If you have had any kind of injury that has restricted your practice, you may be able to relate to this.  You have to force yourself to stop or hold back, but almost more than this, it is the other way around, with your body telling you when to stop.  And similarly to injury there is always a small fear in the back of your mind of pushing that little bit too hard.  There are some things that you actually cannot physically do whether you want to or not, for example as I have written about before, losing abdominal strength and not being able to invert, or not being able to properly stretch my hamstrings due to the bump stopping me from leaning forward far enough.

29-31-33-35 weeks

The other mental challenge for a lot of people during pregnancy is body image.  I've read a few bits of writing from several different pregnant fit chicks and an ongoing theme seems to be dealing mentally with your growing body.  Look, anyone who knows me knows I am not a carrot sticks and protein shake kind of gal, but if you are someone who is used to being pretty strict with your diet and who can control your weight very specifically through the food you eat, then you might struggle with the loss of control over the size of your belly.  Personally I have never been a tiny person, always erring on the "curvier" side, so maybe this made it easier for me to embrace the belly?  I couldn't wait to get a bump, as evidenced by my five million side-on selfies!  Now that I am actually bloody huge and ready to pop, it is hilarious to look back on the pics of my "bump" when I thought it was big, it reminds me of this meme-

As dancers and athletes it is hard to escape conversations about body image and body confidence.  From my point of view and from what I have observed in my students on a daily basis, pole dancing increases women's confidence in their bodies.  I can see 2 very obvious reasons for this.  Firstly, your body shape does change!  As with taking up any new sport, new muscles will develop, you'll be sweating and dancing your little heart out, and some lucky people will shed a few kgs, especially when they first start, or whenever training schedules amp up a level.

Secondly, and most importantly in my opinion, your perception of yourself and your body changes.  You spend a few hours a week staring at yourself and other beautiful women of all shapes and sizes in the mirror in hot pants and bra.  You suddenly realise no one is looking at you and judging you, in the same way that you are not judging them...no one cares!  You start to think perhaps you should be a bit kinder to yourself.  You realise that girl with the six-pack doesn't like her thighs, or the girl with legs to her arm-pits thinks she has too many belly rolls.  The girl whose beautiful shoulder and arm muscles you admire wishes she were more dainty, and the girl with no cellulite and tiny thighs wishes she had more booty.

There is no perfect body out there (ok, I just watched Miss Pole Dance Australia on Saturday night, and may have been proven wrong on this point!  But I bet you they don't think they are perfect!)  What all of our imperfect bodies have in common is the AMAZING things they can do!  Did you ever think you would be able to invert when you started int 1?  I didn't!  Did you see yourself suspended horizontally from the pole supporting your whole body weight through your arms and shoulders???  Hell no!!!!  It is nothing short of amazing what our bodies are capable of, and that knowledge instills a quiet (or not so quiet!) self-confidence deep inside of all of us Polers.  Pole teaches us that we should care less about what our bodies look like and focus on what our amazing bodies are capable of!

For me pregnancy has taught me the same lesson.  With little to no effort on my behalf my body has grown a human!!! With fingers and toes and a heart that beats and lungs that breathe!  And a brain!  A brain!!!  Our bodies are nothing short of miraculous.

And I for one feel incredibly empowered by this amazing body.  Some fit people talk about not feeling sexy or beautiful any more when they are pregnant, but I definitely do!  I feel sexy, beautiful, feminine and divine!  My poor classes had to deal with me still teaching them all the sexy moves, often forgetting how big the bump was and that it might look strange to some people.  Why shouldn't a woman still be allowed to be sexy during this time?  Hopefully none of my darling beginners were too freaked out, and hopefully the boundaries of what is sexy may have been blurred a little for some of my students as they were for me.

I've really enjoyed and embraced dressing the bump, and have loved getting dressed up for events and getting the bump out at the beach.  I find it extremely empowering to waddle down the beach in my bikinis!

Just for fun, and because I don't really have any pole stories to share with you, here's a headstand I attempted a couple of weeks ago at the end of 37wks, just to see if I still could.  Other than feeling a little heavy on my neck and head, it went surprisingly well!  I know from the angle it looks like I'm leaning on the pole, but it was just there for moral support.  So there's still some abs in there somewhere I guess!  I wonder if this skill will be helpful in labour ;-)

So here I am in semi-retirement, playing the waiting game.  I have lost my ankle bones, my feet look like they've been stung by a swarm of bees, I have carpal tunnel in my wrists, have bouts of excruciating sciatica, and can barely sleep at night.  But I have had such an incredibly lucky and healthy pregnancy that I really cannot complain about a few weeks of discomfort.  Since finishing work I have nested big time, deep-cleaned the house, washed every thing in sight, cleaned out cupboards and decorated baby's room....now we wait!!!

Thank you all so much for reading and following my journey.  I hope there are some people out there in the same position who have felt encouraged by my posts.   And as always if you want to message me directly please feel free (roxycarless@gmail.com)  Next blog subject will of course have to be about the journey of getting back on the pole post baby!!  EEK!  Until then, happy poling and remember to love your amazing body!

Lots of love, Roxy the pregnant pole dancer xxx